Since learning that we are expecting another little boy, I've been a tiny bit nervous about how big I will be by the time this little guy arrives. Ok, that's a lie ... I'm actually terrified of what kind of condition I will be in by the time I'm 7 or 8 months pregnant! When I was pregnant with Isabel I swelled to a normal and acceptable size. When I was pregnant with Gabe, things started out very well. It actually took quite awhile for my baby bump to show up and it stayed pretty petite for more than half of my pregnancy. I was pretty proud of my petite little baby bump! I thought that I might carry small for the entire pregnancy and was patting myself on the back for not being one of those women who can't stand up at the end!! Then I hit my 6th or 7th month and all of a sudden I was growing exponentially! My tummy got bigger overnight and people were starting to tell me I looked like I was going to pop when I was only 7 months pregnant (NOTE: I remember each of these evil people and am still holding a grudge against them). It only got worse from there and by the time my due date arrived I was pretty much holed up in my house because 1.) I was so uncomfortable I didn't want to get up off the couch and 2.) I didn't have anything but pajama pants that fit me and even then my tummy stuck out under my shirts because they didn't fit all the way around my belly. It was ugly, people! Very ugly!! Anyway, obviously I survived and even though he was a week late and 9 lbs I recovered without any lasting repercussions.
I started this pregnancy out so hormonal that I was sure that I was having a girl! I didn't have any sickness or mood swings with Gabe ... that all happened with Isabel! I just never even entertained the thought that we were having a boy. I thought "Great! I can pull out all the cute pink stuff we have and this baby will probably be smaller since it's a girl and Isabel's room is bigger so they'll be able to share" and, well, you get the drift! So, when Merrie announced to us that we were having a boy, I was in complete and total shock! It did take some getting used to. I think I've gotten used to the idea now and I've accepted it and I'm actually quite excited about it. Having another boy actually has it's advantages. This means that the two boys will be closer in age and will be able to be best friends! This means that we already have a bed for this little kiddo to sleep in since Gabe has bunk beds!
Of course, along with all the perks, I'm finding myself also somewhat terrified of the not-so-perks. My main concern is my size! I know this is vain and ridiculous and something I ultimately have very little control over, but it is a worry for me. This pregnancy is starting to look alarmingly like my pregnancy with Gabe did. My baby bump is still very petite. I am almost 19 weeks pregnant and people are only just beginning to notice that I'm pregnant. I am savoring these days of pregnancy cuteness because I have this sinking feeling that I am going to blow up like a house any day now. And to compound my fears, I am having the most unbelievable cravings for junk food with this one. I have these days where all I can think about are Doritos or ice cream or a chocolate muffin or pickles (but let's be serious, when do I NOT crave a pickle). When dinner time comes the only thing that really sounds good is pizza or a hamburger! I am doing my very best to exercise my self control (of which I have very little). I think I've done very well at not indulging in my constant junk food cravings. I might have one small bowl of ice cream at night and today I took a baggie of Doritos to work. I figured that I was away from home and I could only eat them until the baggie was empty so I couldn't go nuts, and we barely ever indulge my fast food cravings! Do you know that when I was pregnant with Isabel I craved fresh, steamed veggies???? That's right, for months I only wanted to eat brussels sprouts and green beans and squash! What I wouldn't give for a green bean craving right now!! HA! I'm just afraid that I'm going to be so big that Joel is going to have to roll me around soon and that this baby is going to be bigger than Gabe was. Again, I know I have no control over this and I do have total faith that I CAN do this, but when I project into the future of this pregnancy I am filled with fear and apprehension. I will just be so glad when it is behind me and I am holding this sweet little boy in my arms ... perfect and round and soft and under 9 lbs!!! :)
Ah well, thanks for listening to my ramblings! Something about being pregnant is making me very chatty lately! I am enjoying putting my thoughts and fears and joys into print on this blog for all you poor souls to read. I have noticed lately that I've become very bad about taking pictures. Something about being pregnant and having just moved has made me feel very unsettled in my current situation and things that I am usually so good at and on top of are starting to suffer and become harder for me to maintain. I'm hoping that this is only temporary and I am going to make a concentrated effort starting this week to take more pictures so that I can share them with all of you!
Of course, along with all the perks, I'm finding myself also somewhat terrified of the not-so-perks. My main concern is my size! I know this is vain and ridiculous and something I ultimately have very little control over, but it is a worry for me. This pregnancy is starting to look alarmingly like my pregnancy with Gabe did. My baby bump is still very petite. I am almost 19 weeks pregnant and people are only just beginning to notice that I'm pregnant. I am savoring these days of pregnancy cuteness because I have this sinking feeling that I am going to blow up like a house any day now. And to compound my fears, I am having the most unbelievable cravings for junk food with this one. I have these days where all I can think about are Doritos or ice cream or a chocolate muffin or pickles (but let's be serious, when do I NOT crave a pickle). When dinner time comes the only thing that really sounds good is pizza or a hamburger! I am doing my very best to exercise my self control (of which I have very little). I think I've done very well at not indulging in my constant junk food cravings. I might have one small bowl of ice cream at night and today I took a baggie of Doritos to work. I figured that I was away from home and I could only eat them until the baggie was empty so I couldn't go nuts, and we barely ever indulge my fast food cravings! Do you know that when I was pregnant with Isabel I craved fresh, steamed veggies???? That's right, for months I only wanted to eat brussels sprouts and green beans and squash! What I wouldn't give for a green bean craving right now!! HA! I'm just afraid that I'm going to be so big that Joel is going to have to roll me around soon and that this baby is going to be bigger than Gabe was. Again, I know I have no control over this and I do have total faith that I CAN do this, but when I project into the future of this pregnancy I am filled with fear and apprehension. I will just be so glad when it is behind me and I am holding this sweet little boy in my arms ... perfect and round and soft and under 9 lbs!!! :)
Ah well, thanks for listening to my ramblings! Something about being pregnant is making me very chatty lately! I am enjoying putting my thoughts and fears and joys into print on this blog for all you poor souls to read. I have noticed lately that I've become very bad about taking pictures. Something about being pregnant and having just moved has made me feel very unsettled in my current situation and things that I am usually so good at and on top of are starting to suffer and become harder for me to maintain. I'm hoping that this is only temporary and I am going to make a concentrated effort starting this week to take more pictures so that I can share them with all of you!
1 comments:
Oh Magen, You make me laugh!
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